Funny stuff thats no joke

madmax wrote:

Wow...........that didn't  take long 

IDIOT SIGHTING.

My daughter and I went through the McDonald's driveway window and I gave the cashier a $5 note.
Our total was $4.25, so I also handed her 25c.
She said, 'you gave me too much money.'
I said, 'Yes I know, but this way you can just give me a dollar coin back.'
She sighed and went to get the manager who asked me to repeat my request.
I did so, and he handed me back the 25c, and said 'We're sorry but we don’t do that kind of thing.'
The cashier then proceeded to give me back 75 cents in change.
Do not confuse the people at MacD's.

IDIOT SIGHTING.

We had to have the garage door repaired.
The repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a 'large' enough motor on the opener.
I thought for a minute, and said that we had the largest one made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower.
He shook his head and said, 'You need a 1/4 horsepower.'
I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4 and he said, 'NOOO, it's not. Four is larger than two.'
We haven't used that repairman since...this happened in Ipswich, Qld
IDIOT SIGHTING.

I live in a semi rural area.
We recently had a new neighbour call the local council P & W office to request the removal of the WOMBAT CROSSING sign on our road.
The reason: 'Too many wombats are being hit by cars out here! I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore.'
Story from Collingwood, Melbourne.

IDIOT SIGHTING IN FOOD SERVICE.

My daughter went to a Mexican takeaway and ordered a taco.
She asked the person behind the counter for 'minimal lettuce.'
He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg lettuce.
From Bankstown, Sydney.....

IDIOT SIGHTING.

I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked,
'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?'
To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?'
He smiled knowingly and nodded, 'That's why we ask.'
This happened in Elizabeth S.A.

The pedestrian light on the corner beeps when it's safe to cross the street.
I was crossing with an 'intellectually challenged' co-worker of mine.
She asked if I knew what the beeper was for.
I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red.
Appalled, she responded, 'what on earth are blind people doing driving?!'
She is a government employee in ATO Newcastle NSW AU.

IDIOT SIGHTING.

When my husband and I arrived at a car dealership to pick up our car after a service, we were told the keys had been locked in it.
We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver’s side door.
As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked.
‘Hey,' I announced to the technician, 'its open!'
His reply, 'I know. I already did that side.'

STAY ALERT!
They walk among us, they breed, and they vote…....
You now have 2 options...
Delete it…..
or
Send it along to put a smile on someone's face today!.

HAHAHAHAHAHA

Quote " Idiot sighting " 


I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked,
'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?'
To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?'
He smiled knowingly and nodded, 'That's why we ask.'
This happened in Elizabeth S.A.




maybe this should have been posted in the " Irony thread  " ......................there is no airport at Elizabeth , the nearest one to there is a quite small one at Parafield ( light planes )   

paul wrote:Quote " Idiot sighting " 


I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked,
'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?'
To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?'
He smiled knowingly and nodded, 'That's why we ask.'
This happened in Elizabeth S.A.




maybe this should have been posted in the " Irony thread  " ......................there is no airport at Elizabeth , the nearest one to there is a quite small one at Parafield ( light planes )   

I spotted the error also. It should have been the Morphett Vale International Airport.

paul wrote:Quote " Idiot sighting " 


I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked,
'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?'
To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?'
He smiled knowingly and nodded, 'That's why we ask.'
This happened in Elizabeth S.A.




maybe this should have been posted in the " Irony thread  " ......................there is no airport at Elizabeth , the nearest one to there is a quite small one at Parafield ( light planes )   

Now don't let the facts get in the way of a good laugh Paul

BanditDave wrote:

paul wrote:Quote " Idiot sighting " 


I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked,
'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?'
To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?'
He smiled knowingly and nodded, 'That's why we ask.'
This happened in Elizabeth S.A.




maybe this should have been posted in the " Irony thread  " ......................there is no airport at Elizabeth , the nearest one to there is a quite small one at Parafield ( light planes )   

I spotted the error also. It should have been the Morphett Vale International Airport.

Must be what they mean by " getting high " in Morphett Vale    

2016 has been a tough year for celebrities

Now there's living proof that sex, drugs, alcohol and smoking can't be all that bad for you.

Chook wrote:

Not another one lost to ICE!?

Chook wrote:

goes down better with some tomato sauce on it mate

madmax wrote:

Chook wrote:

goes down better with some tomato sauce on it mate

Just the sort of response you would expect from a "Mexican"

I'm a little disappointed there is not a side dish of tofu.

Ill never look at my can of WD40 again without smiling again. 

Print it out and stick it to a can of it and leave it beside the bed. See what what out better halves say. LMFAO

Having a bad day ?


https://media.giphy.com/media/uasjTbtRB9S00/giphy.gif

I'm surprised he was allowed to have them

Aussie butcher with a sense of humour

Might have been the inspiration for that meat dress Lady Gaga wore

^^^^^ Ha ha ha ha